Champagne

She won't touch one drop of Scotch, she loves champagne
Brandy wine, lager and lime, no, it's champagne
Put that gin in the bin, she wants champagne
Vodka juice ain't no use, champagne!

Drinking, she can drink it in the morning
Yeah, she likes it in the morning, beat the blues out of bed
Disturbing, it's quite disturbing
To see how much she's absorbing, but she never has a sore head

Pleasing, mmm sure, it's pleasing
Serve chilled not freezing, she'll be delighted
Leaving, I was thinking about leaving
Before it gets to be evening, might stick around instead

She won't touch one drop of Scotch, she loves champagne
Brandy wine, lager and lime, no, it's champagne
Put that gin in the bin, she wants champagne
Vodka juice ain't no use, champagne!

Smoking, standing in the rain smoking
And my clothes are all soaking, saturated
Joking, I was hoping she was joking
When she asked me I was choking if we'd be wed

Coping, admirably coping
At my attempts at groping on the bedspread
Weddings, all this talk of weddings
Honeymoons and feather beddings, gonna end in bloodshed

She won't touch one drop of Scotch, she loves champagne
Brandy wine, lager and lime, no, it's champagne
Put that gin in the bin, she wants champagne
Vodka juice ain't no use, champagne!

She won't touch one drop of Scotch, she loves champagne
Brandy wine, lager and lime, no, it's champagne
Put that gin in the bin, she wants champagne
Vodka juice ain't no use, champagne!

Champagne!
Champagne!
Champagne!
Champagne!
Champagne!
Champagne!
Champagne!

"Tea break!"
"Here you get it at five"