The Pygmy Song

Er, two pieces now about foreigners
Um, the first one's a song and the second one's a poem
Of course they're not about foreigners if you yourself listening to this at home are foreign
Um and compatriates with the foreigners in the poem
Of course if you're English like me then they're foreigners but they might not be 'cos you might not be, like me
If you see what I mean.

Er, the first of the two is called er, The Pygmy Song
And if you have to, you have to imagine I am actually er, I'm singing this in the voice of a pygmy.

Four foot three
Four foot three
The perfect height for a real pygmy
I've got a spear that's bigger than me
And I hide behind a youngish tree
With a bone through my nose and a loincloth on
I'm an Englishman's idea of fun
I'm a stereotype you will never see
'Cos he's very tall and I'm a pygmy

Four foot three
Four foot three
The perfect height for a real pygmy
The reason the tigers don't eat me
Is I'm not a big meal
At four foot three