Song Of Insane Jealousy

Er, this is a traditional folk song that I wrote last Thursday.
It's about jealousy.

Um-bum-bum-bum

I'm jealous of Charlie
Because Charlie's been holding your hand
And I'm jealous of Andy
Because Andy once played in your band
I'm jealous of Peter for being so tall
I'm jealous of Simon for existing at all
But most I'm jealous of Charlie
Because Charlie's been holding your hand

Well I dunno why but I love you
Although you don't know I exist
I love you I love you I love you my love
I hope that you're getting the gist

But
I'm jealous of Stephen
'Cos Stephen once kissed you at school
And I'm jealous of Patrick
'Cos you thought Patrick's tricks were real cool
I'm jealous of Edward who bought you a drink
And I'm jealous of Sartre for the things he could think
But most I'm jealous of Stephen
'Cos you once kissed Stephen at school

Well I still dunno why but I love you
Oh I'd do anything to be yours
I'd dedicate my life to becoming your wife
Then dedicate my hand to your chores

But
I'm jealous of Monty
'Cos what Monty wants he just gets
And I'm jealous of Gerald
'Cos Gerald showed you to his pets
I'm jealous of Francis who dances so well
I'm jealous of Stravinsky and Maurice Ravel
But most I'm jealous of Monty
'Cos what Monty wants he just gets

Well I couldn't say why but I love you
Though each day's a torment to me
I've tried staying close but it hurts me the most
As I've learned that love just will not be

So now I live in a cave
Mid a spume and the wave
With the salty sea air in my lungs
And I'm taking each day in whatever sort of way
It seems to turn out as it comes
I'll forget about you in the way that men do
And in time my life will be calm
Solitude and meditation with the appropriate sanitation
Will soothe my brain like a balm

But
I'm jealous of you dear
'Cos you'll get to have all the fun
And I'm jealous of you dear
'Cos your life has really begun
Well I'm jealous of your lovers whom I'm sure are all snakes
And I'm jealous of Kipling 'cos he makes such nice
Poems
And cakes
But most I'm jealous of you dear
'Cos you'll get to have all the
You'll get to have all the
You'll get to have all the fun

Huh