A Literary Song
A F Harrold
Er, this is, er, sort of, er, a song, thing, for the more literary minded members of the audience
It's a little song about W.H. Auden and W.S. Burroughs and their unique fasal fa- fa- facial features.
And it goes like this.
What happened to you, Wystan Hugh
What happened to you?
What happened to you, Wystan Hugh
What happened to you?
You were a handsome youth
The girls all swooned
But then you had a nap in the afternoon
And when you woke up there was something wrong
You looked in the mirror and your face had gone
Replaced by some walnut in a scrotal sac
You pushed at the wrinkles but the flesh was slack
You pulled it smooth but it flopped right back
So you went into the kitchen to make yourself a snack
What happened to you, Wystan Hugh
What happened to you?
What happened to you, Wystan Hugh
What happened to you?
What happened to you, William Seward
What happened to you?
Hmm, what happened to you, William Seward
What happened to you?
You were born one day and the midwife groaned
She'd never seen a baby so bizarrely boned
You had a walking stick and an old man's stoop
And the cough of a smoker rather than a whoop
When you went to school you liked to reminisce
About the good old days and the things that you missed
You were always so old your mother called you Daddy
In the formal occasions you called your father Laddie
So what happened to you, William Seward
What happened to you?
What happened to you, William Seward
What happened to you?
The end.